Top 10 things I can’t live without

I find that the closer to the end of the year it becomes, the more I feel the need to take stock in what my life is; what I have, what I need and what is the clutter that I can do without. I thought the best way for me to do this would be to have a top 10 list, Letterman style, of the top 10 things I could not live without.

1. My family - My husband and our pack (yes, really a pack) of dogs. Rufus and I don’t always see eye to eye on this (as he doesn’t understand why he has to “go” outside) but I love them all. My heart would not be complete without them. And, I cannot forget about my amazing parents, for whom my life wouldn’t be possible.

2. My friends – The only thing better than a night with my honey and our four-legged children, is a night with my ladies. One that involves drinks and either a stage and microphone or some dancing (yes, interpretive counts!). These gals, inspire me daily, make me laugh and they’re hard not to love.

3. The house - I love coming home. It's my haven and I’m thankful for it daily. It’s not exactly where I want it to be, but it will get there. And I do not love it any less.

4. Good food – I love cooking it, I love eating it. Whether it’s discovering a new restaurant or a new recipe, it’s all very ethereal and magical to me. (Especially when pairing it with a good glass of wine)

5. Running – Not something I fully embraced until July of this year and I had to go without in November and I could tell that I was cranky and tired without it. That is my time, time to clear my head, time to spend with mya (my running mate) time to let the world fall around me and time to push my body to the limits. Maybe one day, I'll look like this (hey, a gal can dream, right!?!?!)

6. Reading – I don’t care if it’s a magazine, a blog or a book (okay, yes I prefer a good book) but lately I cannot get enough of decorating blogs and zines (see number 3). Every day there is something new to look at and fawn over, I like to think I’m becoming a bit of a design junky.

7. Daydreaming – Whether it be dreaming of the day I’m finished with school and can move on to find a new job, or the day I find out I’m pregnant or the day I sign adoption papers and I’m handed a little child and hear the words “she’s all yours”. Daydreaming keeps me moving, it keeps me motivated.

8. The past – I couldn’t get rid of it if I tried and I don’t want to. I like to thing I’ve finally learned from my mistakes (yes ALL of them) even if it took me 100 times.

9. The feeling of Hope – The feeling of good things left to come, that yes, life isn’t over at 30, it’s just beginning. I get this feeling every time I’m in B’s arms.

10. Love – Yes, I know it’s cheesy and silly really. But without it nothing would be possible. Without it, I wouldn’t be here, I wouldn’t have B, without the love of myself I wouldn’t be back in school or running trying to better myself. Without it the lives of at least 10 dogs wouldn’t have improved. Without love there is no one, there is nothing.

lets get political, i wanna get political, lets get into political.

http://www.slate.com/id/2234017/?gt1=38001

This article makes some good points, although nothing I didn't already feel or think already. The whole mary-jane shitck has always seemed humours to me, I mean to classify it in the same category as LSD or Xcasty seems, well, ludicrous. I mean, I don't smoke pot, not that I think that there is anything wrong with it, but more so because I'm over the whole being out of sorts in my mind part of my life. I have friends that smoke pot and for these guys I really do feel that it helps them un-wind, helps them lead a happier life. I realize that others may disagree and feel that really they are living in a clouded version of a "happy" life, but think about it, what if that guy who ran into that Amish class and killed all of those poor kids, what if he had had a spliff in his glove box - people don't go on shooting sprees when they're high on marijuana, it just doesn't happen. (disclaimer - I'm fairly certain this has never happened, I couldn't find anything on it, but feel free to correct me if I'm wrong).

And the whole Cuba thing, man, don't folks know that that just made us the "fat kid at the playground" to the rest of the world. There was no need for it, okay, I get it there was the whole "cold war" thing and we cannot forget the failed assassination attempt - but wait a sec aren't we on good terms with Putin, PUTIN people, PUTIN! He makes Castro look like the grandpa from funny shit dad says, hell, Castro basically IS the dood from funny shit my dad says. The trade and travel embargo put on Cuba by the States so many years ago has impacted both countries negatively, any economist can tell you that and any historian would say the same thing. Now, I realize that there is a whole host of reasons that the embargo was put in in the first place, but I think both the people of Cuba and the US would benefit economically and culturally as soon as this embargo is fully lifted.

Now, the gay marriage thing. This is just funny to me, funny because I cannot believe that there is such an uproar about this. Funny because, in this countries very short lifetime we felt the same way about black people, that they were inferior beings to white people. Couldn't attend the same churches or schools, had different bathrooms and water fountains and entrances to stores. And we cannot and must not forget the lynchings, home burnings, and attacks of innocent people. Then came the civil rights movement, and for all we know, without these brave, self-less leaders this country would still be the vicious racist place it once was. Now, I bring up the race thing only because I see a direct line between the rights for black people equal to the rights of gay people, much the same as black people were chased and hosed down and beaten for their cause, you have people like Matthew Shepherd who die in the same vain for just being who they are in their own skin. It was silly and laughable to thing that there was even a time that a black person counted as 1/4 of a person and didn't have the same rights as a white person, I find it equally as silly that a gay woman or man doesn't have the same rights as a straight woman or man. I hope, that somewhere in the very near future we can get over ourselves and see that love is love is love and regardless of your orientation if there are two consenting adults that want to be married - than they should have the right to do so, they should have the right to name their "partner" as their husband or their wife, they should have the right to adopt just as much as the straight couple in the house next to them. I thought that church and state were separate, so how can state put a rule on what the bible says or what God feels?

I am now stepping off my soap box.

can we talk?

Maybe it's the fact that the wedding planning is over and I feel a surge of "free" time or maybe it's that my moms and I went to the Houston Urban Market this past Sunday, and I fell in lurve with lots of stuff, whever it is, I've got it bad.

For seres. I’m in décor searching mode. I’m seriously obsessed with finding the perfect paint for the living room and dining room, I’ve already decided on yellow for the bathroom so that it looks something like this:

And I will own this sink:

And I found this on Etsy that would looks so good in the bathroom next to the above sink:

Thank goodness B lets me have my way when it comes to decorating, I really want a purple dining room, similar to this, although he's not too happy with a dark shad of purple or bright one for that matter:

And in the bedroom, finally decided on a bed, and this is at TARGET:

I haven’t really decided on the living room, yet, I want something pale white or pale gray. But I found this bench on Etsy too, look at that style and that color!?!?! Oh that color!!!!! drool.....

Now I'll get back to work.

a simple kind of life

i find myself more and more attracted to a life away from the city, away from the concrete and steel beams that encompass my everyday life. my latest fantasy is one where we (b & i & the 4 critters of course!) leave it all behind for a beautiful farm in wyoming. one where we could have horses to ride, cows for fresh milk, chickens for fresh eggs. a place i could learn to build fences and run cattle, a place i could learn to become a morning person. i mean really, who wouldn't want to wake up to sights like these on the daily.

and lets not forget that you can find yellowstone here as well.

when i think of raising children, i don't picture it being here. i don't want my kids to be burdened with sounds of sirens every 10 minutes. And having to drive 30 minutes to get to a park or a place where the air is clean and they can be at one with nature. but i wonder if i’d find myself missing the city, the hustle and bustle of it all, i wonder if i would really have more time to be a better person, wife, mom somewhere where life wasn’t so hectic. it’s a nice dream, but i should get back to my current reality.

Things I want of now that the cold is here

Because now that the wedding is over, I'm free to concentrate on ME. ha. I kid, I kid! So the Houston cold is here, or whatever you call it when it's 90 degrees one day and 70 the next and so on.
A good pair of riding boots, similar to the one of following

A good pair of semi-skinny jeans preferably black

A nice high-waist pencil skirt

And I'm very much in like with Karen O's hair and I think I want it. Whats with that, every time I grow my hair out I want it short and when it's short I want it long. WTF?

a table for two please.

I can’t remember the last time I cooked a home-cooked meal. And I don’t mean the kind that includes me opening a box of Lundberg’s farms garlic risotto (http://www.lundberg.com/) and a box of quorn naked chic’n cutlets (http://www.quorn.us/) and making my own sauce and steaming some veggies. I mean the real, homemade from scratch type stuff like my Italian meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I recently found out that you can sub cauliflower instead of potatoes, less calories, less carbs and you’re adding another veggie! Nor have I made my enchiladas, rice and beans in more than a year. Really, I’m half Mexican, but I’m sure if I don’t use this knowledge of cooking, it’ll be forgotten. And lets not forget my favorite, the pre-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving where I over-do myself and make the likes of broccoli rice casserole, hash brown casserole (I’m the ONLY one who likes this!), macaroni & cheese, green bean casserole, brown sugar bourbon turkey, jack daniels chocolate chip pecan pie, gravy, banana pudding and the sorts. And I only say over-do myself because I REFUSE to allow anyone in the kitchen to assist me, I’m a martyr that way ;-). I don’t know what it is about this time of year that makes me want to cook, perhaps it is that it is so close the Thanksgiving and Christmas. Or maybe it’s the upcoming nuptials that makes me feel like I should be providing better sustenance for my soon to be hubby and myself and perhaps one day our children. It’s not that I don’t know how to cook, I do, believe me, I love it too, I just don’t have the time. Lately my days have been work and school, or work and run and homework and wedding stuff. Leaving not much time (or energy for that matter) to cook or to spend some good QT with my honey (it’s even been more than a month since we’ve had date night!). It is my sincere hope that after the wedding, I will be less preoccupied with other things and have more energy to focus on our home and our life and this includes cooking! So, if you’ve got any favorite recipes you’d be willing to share, please do, I’m open to new ideas!

eyes wide open.

I’ve had this feeling for a while that I couldn’t quite put into words. Happiness just didn’t cover it. Balanced didn’t either. I really and truly have no idea how to explain it all. For the first time, and yes I’m positive that it is truly the FIRST time in my life I feel at home. This really and truly began a few years ago when B and I began dating. He smelled familiar, being in his arms was warm and comforting, he made me smile and laugh like never before, I could get lost in his eyes. I enjoyed every moment with him and spent the moments without him waiting to get back to him. And 15 days away from our wedding, all of this still rings true. Recently, I was reading a friends blog about how she should explain to her young son that saying of home is where the heart is, is where you and the people you love are and it occurred to me that B is my home. I bought our house on my own, and lived it in with a great roomie, but it didn’t feel “lived in” until B and the pugs got there. I have a family now, my own family, my soon to be husband and our little family of four-legged babies. My own private paradise resides at 1140 Dorothy St.

Containing with this theme, as you know I’ve been training for the half-marathon coming Jan. 17, 2010. I’ve been doing anywhere between 9 and 16 miles a week for the past 6 weeks. My scale hasn’t budged, not even a little. But B told me that he can tell I’ve lost weight. So today, I did something that I’ve avoided doing for the last 4 years, I looked at myself, really looked at myself and what I discovered what that I’ve got the beginnings of a runners body. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a way to go. But wow, definition in my calves and thighs, thinner waist and arms, stronger back – it’s all there. I was able to do 3 miles in 37 minutes on Tuesday, a personal best so far. It wasn’t too long ago that I couldn’t do a half-mile without stopping 3 or 4 times. And it occurred to me that this is something I’ve done all by myself, for myself. I feel amazing inside and I feel good about my body, another first in my life.